Immaculate (2024)
Writer: Andrew Lobel
Stars: Sydney Sweeney, Álvaro Morte, Simona Tabasco
Where to Watch: In Theaters
Synopsis: Cecilia, a woman of devout faith, is warmly welcomed to the picture-perfect Italian countryside where she is offered a new role at an illustrious convent. But it becomes clear to Cecilia that her new home harbors dark and horrifying secrets.
Thoughts: The very nature of a nun horror movie tends to start off being quiet, subdued, and introspective. All - Christ is my sugar daddy. My Boo. Hey, Boo. Look how good I am at worshiping you. Which is all good. But to balance things out - it is a horror movie after all - there needs to be a fair amount of creepy, of dread, of menace sprinkled in. You know, feed us horror hounds crumb by crumb until the feast. But if I've been watching a movie for an hour and text my husband "This movie is so boring." on a bathroom break, you know things could be going better. That's not to say I didn't respect Immaculate's efforts. They got pretty creative for a minute. And there's some unsettling scenes that I applaud - especially the ending. Wow. You went there. Nice work! But a horror movie shouldn't just be about the payoff in the last act. I don't eat an entire crappy meal just for the last good bite. I want the whole damn thing to be tasty. Let every course be one to savor. To remember. To talk about later. I don't want to fall asleep in my soup. That said, religious horror is one of my favorite horror sub-genres, and my brief Catholic upbringing is still held close to my decaying heart. So in the spirit of forgiveness, I will say, Immaculate wasn't for me. But it is a good movie. And you should watch it. Amen.
3 out of 5 💀s
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